What a bunch of gobbledygook! Whether you’re guilty of using it or have to suffer colleagues using it endlessly, there’s no denying workplace jargon rubs most of us up the wrong way.
So, let’s name and shame the kind of wordplay that would make even David Brent cringe . . . and explore why you should ditch the drivel from your business conversations.
Let’s begin with a classic: blue sky thinking. This phrase is often used to encourage creativity among staff. Instead, it has them rolling their eyes and wishing it was 5pm already.
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Touch base? No one is touching anything, thank you. This is simply a very roundabout way of asking to meet with someone to discuss an issue.
Low-hanging fruit. No, nothing to do with apples, bananas or anything more saucy. It’s all to do with meaningless metaphors. Low-hanging fruit is used to refer to tasks or jobs that are easily accomplished or completed. Oh please, pass the peach . . . schnapps!
Run it up the flagpole. No one is saluting this long-winded way of suggesting trialling a new company strategy.
There’s no ‘i’ in team. This is used to remind teams in the workplace they have to collaborate and work together. Instead it has most of us wondering if the boss has just figured out how to spell.
We’re on a journey. Unfortunately, it’s not to the Maldives but rather a metaphorical business trip and used to describe a project that’s under way but not complete.
These are just a few of the thousands of examples of workplace jargon hated the world over. Now to explain why it’s time to ditch it . . .
It’s indirect waffle. Instead of using confusing metaphors that don’t really mean anything, go for the direct approach. Why touch base when you can meet for a chat? Plain, clear language is essential in business: it removes uncertainty and gets straight to the nub of any deal.
Allowing yourself to get bogged down by balderdash can hint you don’t really know what you’re talking about. In fact, overusing jargon suggests you don’t have power, knowledge or authority over your subject.
Dressing up language and concepts in metaphors simply causes confusion.
It’s also impersonal. Instead take ownership of your ideas and beliefs and explain yourself in your own words.
Want all your colleagues singing from the same hymn sheet? Do away with the hymn sheet and encourage plain speaking and distinctive voices among employees. You’ll soon experience a refreshingly candid conversation that saves time and boosts business.
Meantime, if you’re looking to expand your career with an Executive/Management position, head to s1jobs for the first and last word . . . and no baloney.